DETOX: Week 4

My focal point for week 4 (01/31-02/6) was Ephesians 2:1-10 and it went something like this:

Week 4: Ephesians 2:1-10

  • 31stServe Austin Sunday – today was a bitter-sweet day. Bitter, in that sometimes I hate making the rounds, I like to sink my teeth into one place, and get to know the people there, as opposed to showing up, talking and leaving…HOWEVER, it was more sweet than bitter!  It was amazing to go from site to site and see all these people worshiping God through good works…it was amazing to see those with so much serving those with so little…it was amazing to remember a dream that started in a living room with 20 adults, being played out with over 300 volunteers…it was amazing to see, that often times the unknowns and the impossibilities that God places in us, he will work out, when we are willing to let go and give it to him!  The best part of the whole day, was making the rounds with Sarah by my side…it’s been awhile since I’ve felt she was my partner in this (not because of her, but because of our stage in life with the kids).  She IS my best friend, and there is NO one in this world I would rather do this with.  So, ‘bitter’, may be a harsh word, but sweet is not strong enough…
  • 1st – I feel a war still wages on inside of me.  A madness if you will.  I don’t know how to just make it stop.  Why I feel the way I do sometimes, angers me more.  Often times life seems so trivial, and I think it is because we see each day in the way of minutia, yet we don’t see the dream so we don’t see that each step is a step that ends in the dream if you are faithful to it all.  Today, was really a good day, but I wrestle with wondering, why I can’t just ‘stop’ a feeling inside, or better yet, truly understand why I sometime feel the way I do…
  • 2nd – So, today I begin by asking the Father to help me to hate my pride.  The doubt I am battling, the bias that seeps in, the idols that fight from being burned and crushed, I believe, I hope, I pray are shrinking.  My spirit hates these things, I can feel it.  My spirit recognizes it.  My prayer is that these elements which have become altars I so easily bow to, actually become the wood placed on the altar of my life as a pleasing aroma to the Father, burned as an act of worship, that my life would be the altar offered to God
  1. 3rd – So, yesterday, I just kind of got fed up with wrestling with the things I was wrestling with…so, I though it was time do some confession work, as the Bible says that it is actually supposed to heal us.  So, I did. I got a hold of a man who is really the one person in my life that I would consider my ‘spiritual father’ and became transparent and just spilled it out.  It’s funny, when junk stays in you, it seems to be overwhelming and you can’t see beyond it, when you begin to spill it out, it just seems easier to see – to see it in its entirety, to see what it may connect too, to see it in its foolishness…maybe that is part of the healing process, maybe God does something miraculous with it, much like communion & baptism.  It seems simply like actions, but somewhere God does something extra-natural with it…I don’t know, but it was amazing, and to spare all the detail, He quickly took me to some scripture to simply meditate on.  Anyway, it was good, and I feel good.  Anyway, back to this whole detox thing.  It is funny how some of this spiritual/physical detox period is correlating, it’s almost like they’re supposed too  ;-).  Anyway, So, this week began with some of the junk in my life being brought to the surface, and then I begin the whole confession deal along with prayer (in other words, I added a substance), and I am beginning to feel strong.  Physically, this week I began to add meat back into my diet (fish).  Due to that, I began to work out with weights again…In other words, both my spirit and my body were beginning to feel weak, even thought I was praying/exercising and taking in plenty of scripture and good healthy food…I was missing an element, and when they were added, my life began to be strengthened.  Anyway, I won’t go on too long, but it has been good…
  • 4th-6th – No notes – at Verge

I want to finish this week with a quote from C.S. Lewis:

We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered to us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased.

RECAP: One of the biggest struggles in my life is Joy, true biblical joy.  I am convinced I do not find joy easily, because I don’t easily rest in all that God is for me and my family – period.  My prayer this week is that I will end this last week of Detox being detoxed from self, and the strength to rely on all that God is for me and my family in Christ!

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One thought on “DETOX: Week 4

  1. Pingback: Coming Daily Blog: Detox « EmmausLife

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