Journey of a Wander, pt. 2

Just as a bit of recap from part 1, I feel the pieces of the puzzle the God began to put in my life from an early age are as follows:

  1. A desire for the restoration and rescue of the oppressed, the voiceless, and broken
  2. A desire for God’s presence and glory over measurable success & man’s idea of accomplishment…
  3. A deep desire for global missions specifically Eastern Europe and Islamic Countries…
  4. A new kind of church, that exemplified community like we see and dream of, not manufactured bible studies…a new kind of church that didn’t suck the masculinity out of men, but rather empowered the masculinity inside of them to go, be, risk, and do, by calling out of them that which they thought was dead…

Through the past couple years of journeying God has seemed to bring some of these vague concepts together, in ways, that should seem obvious to me, almost in a, “well, that makes sense” kind of way.  For instance, one of the major ideas I have been wrestling with over the last year and half, has been that of leadership.  Not that, I doubt that God has given me authority or an ability to lead, but rather coming to grips with who I am not, and who I am as a leader.  It is very freeing when you become okay with both.  From there it seems like God allowed me to process the four vague ideas and the idea of leadership through the following experiences (I will share excerpts from my journal):

  • 01/18/10 – We feel God begining to ask both of us to embrace the suffering of others…we don’t know what this means practically, but for me it is to dive deeper into the trafficking nightmare, and for Sarah it is to begin the following and knowing of those children suffering and dying of cancer…I think God began to speak this to us with a boy named Parker.
  • 1/20/10 – “death is the destiny of everyman, and the living should take it to heart…”
  • 02/09/10 – God you are calling me to reorient my life…I feel you are bringing clarity to your vision for my life…help me to be patient and content while I am here (Phil 2:5-10)…
  • 03/29/10 – Father, I don’t know what this means, but I feel the words that are being spoken to my soul are, “change, embrace, submerse, reorient…”  Since January, you have been weighing me down with texts like Isaiah 58; Luke 5:27-28; Luke 14:25-33; Luke 18:24-30; Acts 20:24 and a reviving of Proverbs 31:8-9

I could go on and on about some very significant ideas that I wrote down, and maybe I will at some point, but the point is I feel as if things are beginning to take shape, not that they were chaotic, just more shape.   But here’s the deal, as many of you know, I am on my way to Turkey for the purpose of human trafficking (thought I feel there is more behind the reason I am going), and I have the above grid in which to experience this trip.  I don’t know what that means, but I know it means something.  I don’t know if I am more excited to be in Turkey or to come back to my ANC family with better direction and focus.  I think the biggest excitement is that, I had some plans that I thought were very concrete for 2011, that seem to be no more, so now, the rhino continues to charge through the fog, but with a better idea of the target…

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